Oh to be alone abroad!
The Main Event
Like many others, I have spent a lot of time over the past year on my own. I like being alone, and truly relish watching my shows or carrying out my little routines completely undisturbed. But, after over a year of seemingly endless lockdowns, even I must admit that the novelty of this long-lasting solitude has finally worn off. Part of what makes being alone feel so luxurious, at least to me, is that it’s an escape from the outside world, a time to recharge and reflect on life. However, when, as is currently the case, most of my life consists solely of this alone time, it’s hardly an escape from anything at all.
Although I do enjoy socializing and being around other people, I enter my default, most relaxed state when I’m alone with my thoughts. So, while I miss meeting new people, or even being able to see my current friends in the flesh, I’m also excited about being alone in new situations in a post-covid world - strictly outside of my tiny apartment, that is. Recently, my mind has wandered to the idea of travel, mostly what it will look in the near future, how excited I am for it, and the great trips I’ve taken in the past.
From May 2015 to October 2016 I lived with my boyfriend-at-the-time in Spain. In the summer of 2015, I decided to take a few solo excursions to parts of Europe that I’d never been to before. Prior to this, I’d never traveled anywhere by myself, and I had no idea what to expect. Would I feel unsafe? Would I get bored or lonely? Would I feel awkward eating meals alone in public? Would I, a notoriously bad morning person, be able to get myself up early enough to make the most of my days?
The first trip I took, to Berlin, was a huge success: I Airbnb’ed a 30-something guy’s huge, homey apartment in a trendy neighbourhood, made myself delicious little snacks to eat on my days out, bought a pass that allowed me to zip through three museums in 2 days, and didn’t even feel awkward eating alone at restaurants. I remember I was so relaxed in the city that I even read my book on the U-Bahn, secretly hoping that I’d be mistaken for a local. I bought so many knickknacks on this trip that I had an extremely difficult time shutting my little carry on suitcase and almost missed my flight. Good times!
Almost immediately after I got back to Barcelona, I booked another European excursion - this time to Prague. Most of my memories from this trip involve wandering around while listening to music, often getting lost and having to re-centre myself with Google Maps. I’d love to resurrect the playlists I was listening to on my ancient iPod at this time to see how they’d make me feel now, whether they’d spark any specific recollections of my trip, or if I’d be unable to connect with the person who’d painstakingly created and listened to them over half a decade ago.
To be honest, the idea of being free enough to just stroll around to my heart’s content like I did on these trips is completely unfathomable and bizarre to 2021 me: it’s actually sort of hard to remember what it was like to have so many opportunities, or potential adventures, at my feet. I never felt alone on these trips, even though I hardly spoke to anyone and mostly eavesdropped on other tourists’ conversations. For me it was enough to just be around other people, either in a museum, or an old church, or in the hallway of the apartment building where I stayed in Prague and locked myself out of. I love people watching and wondering about others’ lives or where they’re going.
Even thinking about this time in my life makes me feel emotional: I would give almost anything to go back to wandering around a mysterious European city completely ignorant of the words “curbside pickup” and “lockdown,” or as yet untriggered by the way Doug Ford says “folks.” Since I took these trips, I’ve spent very little time reminiscing about them or longing for the freedom they represent, especially since my non-lockdown life is blissfully full of choices and potential adventures. However, there’s nothing quite like spending 13 months being stuck within the same four walls to make you realize how much you value the ability to explore new places!
The last solo trip I took was to Budapest, and by this point I was a bit overwhelmed by the idea of exploring another new city by foot (POOR ME), or plotting my daily excursions (GET OVER IT). Despite my travel fatigue (EYEROLL), I managed to get a lot of walking in, and explored almost every inch of Buda Castle. I have no clue what I ate, though - I literally have zero memories of eating anything in Budapest other than a sandwich I bought at a cafe next to the Hungarian Parliament Building. Spotty memories aside, I wish I could go back and truly savour my time there, but I know that when I have the chance to travel alone again I will treasure it in a new way. I’m not sure where I’ll go next, but I absolutely cannot wait to pretend to be a local, listen in on some juicy conversations, and cue up a fire playlist.
Some Other Stuff
Something I’ve Been Reading Recently: I am obsessed with Hunter Harris’ newsletter, Hung Up. It makes me laugh out loud, and recently I’ve been looking forward to reading new editions on Tuesday and Friday. She’s also great on Twitter!!
Something I’ve Been Watching Recently: One of my friends turned me on to Couples Therapy, a high quality reality show that follows couples in their therapy journeys (lol, duh) with Dr. Orna Guralnik. Honestly the main reason I enjoy watching this show is because of Dr. Guralnik: she’s so calming and warm and intelligent. However, watch in small doses - it’s possible for it to be a bit too much if you binge.
Something I’ve Been Thinking About Recently: Friendship has been on my mind this week, and this article only furthered my pondering. I don’t have much to say about it other than it’s a good read and makes sense to me!
Something I’ve Been Listening to Recently: If you’ve been in touch with me recently you might know that I recently discovered I have a crush on the late lead singer of INXS, Michael Hutchence (he was especially hot between the years of 1990 and 1994). I have not been able to stop listening to his band’s absolute JAM, Need You Tonight, and I have linked its music video below. Enjoy!
Have a good week! Have you ever traveled solo? Do you sleep in late even on vacation? Also, please join me in wishing one of my closest friends, CARLY GREENBERG, a very happy 30th birthday!!! I am so grateful for the ways our friendship has grown over the years, and I will be giggling about Mike Wasowski until approximately the end of time.
Cute up your life,
Diana
I am a very privileged individual. Lockdown has not represented any financial loss or illness to me or my family, but gawd do I miss travelling. Those trips you made were more than just travel experiences. They represented freedom and provided personal growth. Your newsletter reminded me of how these present times of restriction, while necessary, have also put constraints on our ability to learn about ourselves through new experiences. As you know I too yearn for the time when I can fill a little day pack and wander around the streets of my beloved London. and other as yet unknown destinations. We're getting there.